“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection”
I was fortunate enough to be raised by a family where being honest with one another and speaking our minds was natural and encouraged. This in no way means that being so made us disrespectful of one another, it was actually quite the opposite. It has brought us to a point where we are all very close. We are not afraid of calling each other out on any subject. Talking things through, we all feel very comfortable and at ease with each other. There are no secrets or skeletons, and our deep love and affection for each other is quite evident. We know that we are all unconditionally loved by each other. We feel safe.
We also know that this affection does not give anyone of us a free pass for being right. We never make excuses for one another because we are related. We don’t put up with any kind of disrespect nor would anyone of us even think to do anything to each other without the best intentions in mind. If anything, we expect more from each other because of our close relationships.
I share this with you, dear reader, because of all the pain, anguish, resentment, and excuses I have encountered with others’ family issues. It is always unsettling to me when I see someone putting up with some form of major dysfunction, in one way or another, because they are “family”. Making excuses for their bad behavior because they are “family”. Biting their tongues because they are “family”. Accepting their abuse because they are “family”. Enabling them in one way or another because they are “family”.
Our family members have in them the greatest capacity for the love that surrounds and nurtures us. They also, in turn, have the greatest capacity to hurt and destroy our spirit. We expect more of them because they are family for they also have the power over us cause feelings of great disappointment and sadness.
If you have no other choice but to be in the presence of family members that are hurtful and/or disrespectful, you must approach them in a way that is true and honest to yourself. If confronting them on an issue is the answer, please do so. If totally avoiding them is possible, please do so. If worse come to worse and cutting then out of your life entirely is the only healthy way for you, then please do so. I do not mean to seem callus. This is not my intention. My intention is for you to not allow anyone to make you feel badly about yourself or the ones you love, even it they are family. Like I said before, you should expect more of them and no less. If you come to the realization that they are not capable of showing the love and respect that you deserve, then you can no longer find yourself capable of accepting their warped sense family. This madness stops with you.
Free yourself from these unrealistic bonds. Be true to yourself and set a positive and empowered example for your children, other family members, and friends. You deserve to be loved unconditionally in the right way!
I’m quite sure I was born with a smile on my face. I am innately a smiler and hugger. It does not matter if I know you or not, smiles (and hugs) are given often and freely by me, and I am grateful to be this way; for a smile given to another is a wonderful gift. It always has a positive impact on the recipient. When you smile you look prettier (or more handsome), for your face glows and light shines through your eyes. Facial recognition shows acceptance and approval to others. It makes you feel good on the inside while sharing your kindness outwardly.
Smiles cost nothing. They are easy to make, they help you to feel better when you are sad, depressed, or angry. And, when given freely, they a have payback of tenfold.
Being an avid smiler, at the same time, I also realize that this form of expression can be very difficult for some. Whether they are going through a very difficult period or just have a hard time showing their feelings. The latter, may view smiling as a weakness or vulnerability. I am here to tell you that it is not. It is both beautiful and fulfilling!
So please smile wide and often. And if no one has smiled upon you today, be my guest and take this post as my big smile to you, because you matter and deserve it! Oh yeah, and here’s a quick hug. Now, go out and share!
Our ‘furry friends’, our little bundles of love and affection, or our family pets. These awesome “relatives” are the most uncomplicated and vulnerable members of our family. They require only food, water, shelter, and a safe place to sleep. In return, they give to us all the unconditional love and affection they have to offer, as though it was their purpose to make us happy and to feel needed. They seem to be in constant “show of appreciation” mode.
Pictured above are me and our dog Skippy, aka Skippy Doodles, taken last summer. He is my shadow, my little buddy. Yes, he can be tiresome sometimes with his in and out and in and out needs and an “accident” here or there; but really, that’s about it. I never have to look far to find someone around to make me feel like I am the most important person alive. It is as though how I feel matters to him. To some, this may sound a bit odd, I know, but this is the vibe he presents to me all the time.Of course, he is treasured by everyone in our household. We are blessed to have him as part of our family.
If you have a pet already, I’m sure you can relate to these feelings of affection toward your furry family member also. If not, and you are open to the idea, I would suggest adopting one of these loving creatures for yourself. To know the love of a pet is quite different from any other love relationship you may have had. This unconditional love enriches your life in many ways, some of which include: a friendship/companionship more loyal than most, a complete desire for your happiness, and the gift of approval on a daily basis. Also, there is a stress relieving factor that pets seem to exude over humans as well as a healing component for the ill.
I suggest this special relationship to you in order to enrich and diversify the love around you. The gift of a family to a pet, especially to one who is in great need of a home, is a most beautiful act of kindness on your part; and in return, you will be repaid tenfold by your new family member for years to come.